27 Valentines Day Sidetracked a Bit by 16 Years of Chronic Pain

“Chronic Pain is just that . . . CHRONIC; it rarely cuts you a break, never goes away, and it changes EVERYTHING—IF YOU LET IT.” -Anonymous

“Worrying won’t stop the bad things from happening; it just stops you from enjoying the good.” –Anonymous

On February 14, 2104, my husband and I celebrated the first day that we met 27 years ago on Valentines Day Night, February 14, 1987. At the beginning of the week (Feb. 2014), I was feeling well – for someone who has lived with chronic illness and chronic pain for 16 years. So, my husband and I made special plans to celebrate the 27^th Anniversary of the Day we first met. He made lunch reservations at a beautiful restaurant in a nearby city, and purchased online tickets for a matinee that we would see afterwards. My husband is so considerate of me, and while he would rather watch an action adventure or a science fiction movie, he chose a movie filled with Love and Romance, because he understands (after 27 years together) that I would rather watch a love story or a romantic comedy when we go to the movies together.

We both were looking forward to our 27^th Valentines Day afternoon together; but, we have both learned that it is often difficult to make plans and to keep our plans because of my chronic health issues. AND, when I woke up at 2 am on Friday morning and could not get back to sleep; when I began to have a horrible headache, a dull pain in my right hip, and stomach pain, I began to cry and to pray. I have often asked God when I pray, “Why I am one of the millions of people in the world chosen to struggle with Chronic Illness and Chronic Pain?” I cried because I realized that my husband and I would not have our Valentines Day Celebration as we had planned. I prayed that God would take my pain away (enough) so that we would be able to enjoy our special day together. I prayed that God would give me emotional and physical strength to enjoy our day together, even though I was experiencing pain.

Since I have had 16 years to adapt my life to Chronic Pain, I am thankful for every day, but especially grateful for the days when I feel physically well; yet, I also understand that there is always a chance when some aspect of my chronic illnesses/pain may interrupt my life—and not in a way that I look forward to. My husband understands this, too. So, when I walked into his home office around 9 am Friday morning, still in my pj's, he looked into my eyes and knew that we wouldn't be celebrating the 27^th day that we met the way that we had planned earlier in the week. He also looked at me with all the love that a husband could ever have for his wife. As I saw sadness and concern come over his face, I knew that his look of empathy was not because we wouldn't be enjoying lunch and a matinee together; instead, I understood that it was he was confirming his constant compassion that he always demonstrates when I experience chronic pain flare ups. After 27 years together, we appreciate our marriage, our love, our friendship, and our family, and we welcome each day that we share together—chronic pain and all.

If you are a healthy person, have a few aches and pains that go away on their own or after you take a Tylenol, perhaps you do not understand why I am writing my 27^th Valentines Day story in this way. Two of my favorite quotes that I have found online as I have been researching the lack of understanding about Chronic Illness and Chronic Pain are “CHRONIC PAIN: Unless you get it, you don’t get it” (Anonymous) and  “The Greatest Wealth is Health” (Sarchar Leone).  I realize that many who read this may think that I am complaining and whining when I write about or speak about my pain and my health issues . . . But, those of you who are part of the hundred million people in the world today who suffer with some form of Chronic Illness or Chronic Pain—I know that you understand. As many with Chronic Illnesses choose to live their lives of chronic pain in silence, I am stepping out to break the silence and the misunderstanding about the causes, cures, and treatments of the disease known by many names, which I call “Chronic Pain.”

          I ask you to stand with me and to stand beside me as I further my Mrs. Mississippi International 2014 message to “Bring a Voice to the Silent World of Chronic Pain.” I value your support, your encouragement, and your interest in a platform that is not spoken about often enough in the world we live in.

         I also want you to know that neither my husband, nor myself are upset that we didn't get to celebrate Valentine’s Day 2014, out on the town together. We recognize that each day of our marriage is a celebration of the life that we have together and the blessings that we share together as husband and wife and as the parents of our two beautiful daughters. While we all continue to hope and pray for my freedom from chronic pain, we each accept my life as it is moment by moment—Chronic Pain may hinder me, but it will not keep me from living my life to its fullest! Some days, Chronic Pain may stop me for a time; but, I will get up and keep going. And with my husband and my girls by my side, with the support of other family members, and friends, I will continue to strive, to survive and to thrive through Chronic Pain!

—Stop Worrying about things you can’t control

—Each Day is a Gift

—Acknowledge Chronic Pain through Compassion, Understanding, and Awareness

Jeremiah 29: 11-13

Be Brave,

Angie Russell Irvin

Mrs. Mississippi International 2014

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Learn How the 2014 Jackson Heart Ball Exceeded My Expectations

“DO SOMETHING GOOD EVERY DAY: Try to do one good thing for yourself every day. You’re Heart and you Life will thank you.”

“When in doubt WEAR RED” –Bill Blass #MacysGoesRed #GoRedforWomen 

Also see the link below from the Lifestyles section of VIP Jackson Magazine online; January 29, 2013 for an article abut the organizers of the 36th annual Jackson Heart Ball:

http://www.vipjacksonmag.com/article/20140130/FEAT/301300024/Jackson-Heart-Ball-good-time-good-cause

February 2014 marks the 50^th Anniversary of American Heart Month. On, Friday, January 31^st, my husband and I attended Mississippi’s 2014 Jackson Heart Ball. The Heart Ball is Mississippi’s major fundraising event for the American Heart Association, which also kicks of the month of February and American Heart Month as Mississippians campaign for and raise funds for the American Heart Association. As Mrs. Mississippi International 2014, I was honored to have the chance to be among the patrons and sponsors at who gathered at the Jackson Country Club to promote Heart Disease Awareness and Go Red for Women. Heart Disease is still the #1 Killer among women (according to www.heart.org).  

We were graciously welcomed by Metro Jackson Heart Association staff and volunteers, who quickly registered us inside the Jackson Country Club Lobby, gave us our lovely Heart Ball program books, and informed us about the night’s scheduled events. I enjoyed taking photos with my husband and with Heart Association Staff for the Heart Ball Facebook page, Jackson’s VIP Magazine, and other Mississippi magazines— walking the AHA “Red Carpet” as photographer after photographer took our pictures in different areas of the Country Club.

    

        I met with Liz Young, Youth Market Director for the American Heart Association in Mississippi as Liz and her husband, Brad, took my husband and me on a tour of the 15 pieces in the Art in the Heart Gallery that were sold during the Dinner Program’s Live Auction. Liz and I had an in-depth conversation about the influence her work with Mississippi’s junior high and high school students, promoting CPR training and certification, healthy eating, and physical education programs in our state’s public and private schools. We arranged to work together, with her pull from the MS Heart Association and my assistance as Mrs. Mississippi International 2014 to reach out to the schools and the MS hospitals that Liz has not yet been able to speak with in MS. My husband and I took a photo with Liz and her husband to celebrate the Heart Ball and American Heart Month that I will post on my Facebook page and blog once it is made available to me. I also enjoyed meeting Elizabeth Williams, Health Strategies Assistant for the Metro Jackson Heart Association, who I have spoken with many times over the phone leading up to the Heart Ball. Elizabeth was very interested in the Mrs. International Pageant’s patronage of the AHA Go Red for Women. Elizabeth and her husband were 2 of the 10 Mississippians who recently traveled in late January to our nation’s capitol to advocate for the AHA You’re the Cure program.

                                      

                                       A cute "selfie" of my husband Danny and me

                

        When I glanced at my cell phone as my husband and I prepared to leave the Heart Ball, I noticed that earlier in the night I had received an email from the 10 Mississippi Advocates who worked so diligently for the American Heart Association’s You’re the Cure-Take Action Advocacy Agenda in our nation’s capital. I was excited to quickly browse through the email because I attentively followed the AHA You’re the Cure Advocates in Washington D.C. and encouraged their efforts (along with 4,800 other advocates around the US) by sending personalized AHA messages urging state and federal elected officials to support the 2014 AHA You’re the Cure agenda.

       We enjoyed a delicious dinner at the Heart Ball and watched in awe as the Live Art Auction sold 15 pieces of art for over $50,000 for the AHA. My beautiful red gown sponsored by Classy Closet in Eupora, Mississippi, along with my stunning Mrs. Mississippi International 2014 sash, led to opportunities such as these to speak, not only to Metro Jackson Heart Association Staff, but also to so many other Heart Ball patrons and sponsors about the role of our International Pageant family in our support of Go Red for Women, the American Heart Association, and the Fight Against Heart Disease and Stroke.

                                                            

                                                                    Scene from the Live Auction

                     

The Heart Balls agenda included:

·         The Red Room Mini Live Auction

·         The Heart Ball Silent Auction

·         The Red Room Seated Dinner Program

·         The Richard Lee Miller Heart Saver Award-presented to the 2014 Heart Saver Award Recipient, Chloe Sumrall- a Freshman at the University of MS, who because of her CPR Certification, literally saved the life of Fred Cayia, when he suffered Sudden Cardiac Death, a condition in Mississippi that has less than a 2% chance survival rate

·         The Live Auction of an exotic vacation in Mexico, along with Watercolor Prints, Oil Paintings, Abstract Figurines, and Abstract, Landscape, and Realist Canvases that together raised approximately $60,000

·         The Open Your Heart Live Donations from attendees

     -donations ranged from $250-$5,000

·         The Coop D’ Belle After Dinner Dance and Entertainment

            

-Each Day is a Gift

-Conquer Chronic Pain with Compassion, Understanding, and Knowledge

-Continue the Fight Against Heart Disease and Stroke

Jeremiah 29: 11-13

Be Brave,

Angie Russell Irvin

Mrs. Mississippi International 2014

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Understanding My Chronic Pain and the Ways I Have Learned to Live Positively and Determinedly with It

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” –Dalai Lama

Each day that I wake up -whether I greet a sun rise, clouds, or a rainy day- the first thing that I wake up to is a pain in some area of my body; still, I am exceedingly, genuinely GRATEFUL that I am awake, and that I have the chance to live out my life the way that God planned it out for me. Life is an amazing gift. I am thankful that I God granted me awe-inspiring healthiness and well-being for 33 years of my life. I remember waking up each day, my feet hitting the floor, up and going, without a thought to how well I felt--never contemplating that some day my good health might quickly and conclusively disappear from the life that I led.

If you have never faced chronic pain, a chronic illness, or an autoimmune disease, I realize how difficult it is for you to identify with the life that struggles and trials that I have faced with my health issues for the past 15 years. I have been told, “Just get up, get dressed and go.” But when you live with a constant pounding, throbbing headache that begins in the lower back portion of your head and travels up and around your entire head the inside out, there are days when that is simply not a possibility. When you live with chronic muscle pain or when you wake up several nights each week with a deep, agonizing, aching cramps in your back, legs, neck, and arms that force you to groggily walk around your bedroom until you can at least lie back down in your bed--not to go back to sleep, but at least to rest with some pain relief, the next day your body tells your mind: “Just stay in bed today.” I think back to the days that I was practically bed-ridden from pain. And now, I am fortunate to "get out of bed" and to "get up and go and do"--I have learned to push through my pain and to appreciate the days when my pain has lessened. When you are fortunate to get 6-7 hours of uninterrupted sleep at night because typically you sleep around 4 hours, waking up every 30 minutes to an hour, without ever going into deep REM sleep; perhaps, a truly healthy person might at least acknowledge the chronic fatigue syndrome that I live with. If you haven’t had 5 major surgeries, including a hysterectomy that was performed to stop a 3 year long, intense, almost unbearable bladder pain (referred to by many as interstitial cystitis), or a lower back L5-S1 surgery to stop the sciatic pain running from the top of your right hip to the bottom of your numb, painfully burning right foot-- no, you probably do not grasp the fibromyalgia, the degenerative disc disease, or the degenerative arthritis that I live with each day. If you have never been diagnosed with Vitamin B12 deficiency, been hospitalized for days because your B12 level drops to 90, when it is supposed to range between 500 and 1000; if you have never felt the energy drain from your body, the brain fog resulting from the neurological effects of Vitamin B12 deficiency; and if you do not have to take a B12 shot 1-2 times each week for the remaining days of your life, please be thankful; and, if you it is still difficult for you to understand my plight, then I know that my goal to teach others about the reality of living with chronic illnesses and chronic pain is a noteworthy and far-reaching aspiration.

Please do not think that I am having a pity party for myself as I am writing about how I have learned to exist with chronic pain. I am blessed beyond measure to wake up each day. I am appreciative for the many caring doctors who have helped me discover that acupuncture, relaxation techniques, biofeedback, and yes, certain medicines can work together to bring me days when I might even forget about my chronic pain for a while. I am indebted to my immediate family members, to my two daughters, and especially to my husband who loves me with every soul of his being, is my caregiver when I need him, my greatest cheerleader, and my indescribable prayer warrior.

It is important to me to share with anyone who will listen about my everyday struggles and triumphs as I live with chronic pain. It is also my wish to be supportive to the hundreds of millions of people all around my home state, our nation, and the world who live with the pains of chronic illness, to validate their pain, and to reveal the different forums that bring the world of "Chronic Pain Survivors" together. I trust and I hope that my encouragement, my positivity, my gratitude for the life that God has allowed me to live will help others who live with chronic pain and chronic illness. My quest, ANGIE’S QUEST is to: Bring a Voice to the Silent World of Chronic Pain and Chronic Illness. As I write about my year as Mrs. Mississippi International 2014, most of my writing will focus on how privileged and honored I am to have this prestigious title, concentrating on my platform “Compassion4ChronicPain,” and revealing the many opportunities that I have to share my individual, personal platform and the national platform of the Mrs. International Pageant--the American Heart Association's Go Red for Women. 

Yes chronic pain has changed my life; yet, I realize, without a doubt, the amazing gift that my life has always been and will continue to be-without or withstanding chronic pain.

 

-Each Day is a Gift

-Conquer Chronic Pain with Compassion, Understanding, and Knowledge

Jeremiah 29: 11-13

Be Brave,

Angie Russell Irvin

Mrs. Mississippi International 2014

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